people do not act this way

it's hard to think back to betrayal

and that's what i'll call it for now

already told the graphic detail

just betrayal for now

perhaps it's more universal this way

and i wonder

how many see humanity in judas

it's hard to get back into my head

change can turn into stangers

back then did i believe it was

only about intention

i didn't mean to hurt anyone

looking back it's hard to know

if i meant anything

feeling as stable as a plastic bag

filled with liquid

i didn't mean to derail

years of susinct intention

i didn't mean to hurt myself

thought i was saving myself

from loneliness

later i didn't mean to hurt

by self judgment

picking scabs and pouring salt

saying there was no scum worse than i

saying people do not act this way

when we say people do not act this way

we look around searching

self-centered in so many ways

the eyes don't turn in

people do not act this way

we do

i'm done with judgement

this is my intention

done with betrayal

this is my intention

but though i've changed

that old me was still human

like i am now

knowing people act

as they will