us
it was not always certain
to be what it is
our love was always certain
it has taken time
it has taken us, taking
chance
there were arms held out
the window
one room in one brick
building
in one city covered by
autumn leaves
the arms held out a lit
cigarette
it burning with
deliberation
the smoke was escaping
we talked a lot about trust
then
me having fractured it
and asking for chance
to have it back
it seems like this should
have been covered
somewhere in the love poems
before
have i neglected this poem
instead, saving it
as a quick story explaining
what it took
this isn’t quick
this isn’t just the part
about
getting in the car in the
desert
driving all night and
another day
to stand and ring the bell at
her place
flowers in hand
this is these conversations
had, holding lit cigarettes
out the window
had, with head in hands
resting on chins
looking into tearful eyes
that certain love
was the easy part
was there forgiveness
was trust enough
were we tired enough
of running and reuniting
in that apartment
on grand avenue
we did enough
talking and holding
chancing rejection
and future hurt
it was not certain
i remember my young self
looking into her blue eyes
and feeling her lips on
mine
fearing it was a sweet
final goodbye
and yet there is us
us now
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